ESSAY

just came back from audi. sort of quarreled with him over audi.
its all my fault. im so useless who cant defend him. a friend came
in and we played. and dat friend called dear noob. then i said him
bad. and i nvr scold him or whatever. im so bitch right? say yes.
then..dear is so disappointed with me. then he went to play with
his cousins. i played club. lol ima flirt hor? play lor.. dear says
he's too noob to play with me. then he dont wanna play. then nvr
wanna bother him. saw a audi person whom dear knows uh. after
dear left.. i made friend with the girl. then talk talk.. then dunno
wad she knows dat we quarrel.then talk talk i asked her wad else
he said bout me. she said "no gf is like u. nvr defend bf." lol. then
i took it for real. yeah. im so stupid. then play play play... lalala.
out of club, saw him and coza in room. i understand ahh... they are
friends blablabla. they are nothing. dear has me blablabla. there's no
nid to think so much haha. always see them in a room its ok i know
and i understand. dat tym im in a room with a guy in audi, he scold
me. lol nvm. bcuz i dunno who is dat audi person..he just wanna
train me then i got scolded. lol. ai ya so long liao still say..im so petty.
anw,i cr8ed a room for myself named: dear im sorry. password: lonely.
really lonely ah. then i asked the gal to do me a favour to ask how
dear find about me. he's ans is still sad and disappointed. then she
told me "i told him dat i walked pass ur room and saw dear im
sorry" then he said "so?" then im so dead. everything sank. like
im in a gone case, good game mode liao.. but after asking him y he
said so, he said he dont want her to come into our problems. settled?
but still bo mood ah. he wanted me not to wear on the "bikini" audi
shirt when playing club. he wanted me to delete that guy who said
him noob in audi. he wanted me to tell him if whether got ppl asked
me for number in audi. and i said "oo" everytime. im so attitude sia.

im so bothered! like.. why he got this kind of
gf? wad the fuck can i do? kao im the worst person on earth who
doesnt know how to auto. like fuck! bitch! asshole! kao la. why am
i so idiot? like a wall, like a wood. wah kao. i hate myself la. still
cannot forgive myself on how i left my section. im so selfish! SELFISH
like a bitch. man! i dont deserve anything la. im so attitude. like
fucker lidat. im so guai lan. yes and everybody knows that. LOL.
why cant i be more caring to others? what the fuck am i doing in this
world? to make ppl not happy in life. lol yeah. im like a pest here.
and, i dont wish u to comfort me. please do not be pissed. cuz im
scolding myself and not u. sorry.

its all my fault and im blaming myself. lol natural! ima natural human.
change? time to cool, time to chill, time to change. hahah. anyways!
who can read my mind? LOL come read. talk to my head, my brain
and me!asked hazel mother whether she loves me anot. she says yes.
^^she loves me. still got more answers to get from others :D

where will everybody go after death? heaven or hell? is it nice
or more sufferings then being on earth? wad will happen after
that?

i wished that im cleverer.
i wished that i dont waste my parents money.
i wished that everybody dont hate me.
i wished that i dont have to think.
i wished that i dont have to make decisions so hardly.
i wished that i can be with him till forever.
i wished that i can know how to listen to others.
i wished that nobody can control me.
i wished that i got more money.
i wished that i have lots of happy moments.
i wished that i learnt how to love everyone more.
i wished that my family will be loving.
i wished jealousy doesnt existed.
i wished that i know more about myself and wad i wanted.
i wished that the poor can be rich.
i wished that im prettier.
i wished that everyone doesnt need to die.
i wished to know how to stop the pain.
i wish i wish i wish. LOL. im so lame! :DDD
goodbye.

XIANG-XIANG :D
sweet 16 .
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